Harvard Application Essays POV Blog
You have just completed your third set (this time… point of view) of Harvard application essays. What stood out to you and why? What were you able to take from the samples that might influence the final copy of your college application essay? DUE 10.07
October 5th, 2009 at 2:29 pm
The essay that stood out the most to be was “The Magic of Magic”. Greenbaum does a wonderful job of making his essay different and entertaining, yet, telling the reader all about his interest in magic. By including a color-coated chart as a magic trick, it catches the readers eye and keeps them interacted and interested. Another essay that stood out was “The End Is Where We Start From”. Jacobs does a great job with making a could-be-boring essay into something different. An essay based on a quote seems like something I would never do because it is so different, but Jacobs did a grand job putting it all together. Though, my personal favorite was “On Diplomacy in Bright Nike Running Tights”. Kirchhoff makes a simple topic into something more exciting, leaving the reader to only think about bright Nike tights. By reading these examples I’ve gotten to see different essays from the one’s we’ve already read, these Harvard essays show different perspectives of simple topics being turned into something greater. It shows that anyone can take something small and make it into something great, without having to type out a million words to convey a point.
October 5th, 2009 at 3:29 pm
I thought that the essay that stood out with this set the most was The Magic of Magic because it was interactive and personal. The writer involved the reader in an activity before actually reading which catches the interest of the reader causing us to want to read on. I have never read an essay that actually did that before so I thought it was interesting, intelligent, and original. These essays showed me that you can take something that seems boring or hard to write about and turn it into a great essay, that gets your point across, with ease.
October 5th, 2009 at 8:01 pm
The beginning of “Introducing Clark Kent and Willy Wonka” stood out as personal, detailed, and interesting enough to keep me wanting more. By the middle of the third paragraph, however, I found myself naturally skimming passed the boring accounts of how the author mixed his intellectual and personal aspects of his life. I sounds like he thesaurused half the sentences – out of place vocabulary usage.
“Thoughts Behind a Steam-Coated Door” was particularly memorable for its great descriptions and relatable content. You could feel what the reader was saying, rather than glancing at black-and-white lines across a page.
The samples (and their analyses) showed me that college application readers do not want to hear your big vocabulary and cliche ideas that vaguely answer the prompts. They want details and unique personal flair – not unique situations but more HOW you can use them into a compelling, 500-word snitbit of who you are.
October 6th, 2009 at 6:58 am
The essay that stood out to me the most would have to be “On diplomacey in Bright Nike Running Tights” because it took something so unimportant, such as running tights and helped to create story that truley helped to explain the view of the writer, without listing. It grasped my attention, because I didn’t know that one could learn so much about a person based on one run and the running tights he wore. It gave me a new perspective on how to write my essay, because i realized I could focus many things about myself based around one thing, one object. The other essay that stood out was “The Magic on Magic” because of the chart in the beginning it grasped my attention. I did not know that you could incorperate such things into your essay. I did try the chart and landed on “it” I found this to be really cool and made me want to read the whole essay. So i learned that i can take and simplify my essay to one event and still tell all about myself.
October 6th, 2009 at 7:02 am
I really liked “Vietnamese Soup.” I think it accurately showed a point of view, rather than another memorable moment. I guess I’m still surprised at how normal the Harvard essays are, that they’re not this extaordinary, unreachable quality of writing. I think all of the essays are successful because they tell stories and everyday moments in an interesting way. The plot doesn’t have to be intersting or unique, just the way in which it is presented. These essays have motived me to approaching topics more creatively and use vivid detail to make mundane events interesting.
October 6th, 2009 at 7:05 am
The Points of View essays were all very different and interesting. I liked how the topics ranged from running in Russia, to magic tricks. All of these essays were very detailed in their personal experiences, and showed more about the authors personalities. The essay that stood out the most to me was “The Magic of Magic.” This essay really caught my eye with the chart of words, and the author telling the readers to go along with this magic trick. It was a very memorable essay because it began with a very different technique, and the magic trick worked. Another essay that I liked was “On Diplomacy in Bright Nike Running Tights.” This essay really showed that this author was dedicated to running, so he must be dedicated to many other things in life. He described in great detail his location, from the temperature outside, to his winter apparal. These essays really showed the authors point of view, without being boring and cliche.
October 6th, 2009 at 7:09 am
The essay that most stood out to me was Thoughts Behind A Steam Coated Door. I really liked it because I like to think in my shower too. Its like my own little world that I can do whatever I want in. I found that colleges like more creativity, rather than the steroeo typical essays. They like to read essays that show who you are and why you stand out rather than why you blend in to the crowd.By reading these examples I’ve seen that these Harvard essays show different perspectives of simple topics being turned into something greater.
October 6th, 2009 at 7:10 am
I think that the essay that stuck out the most was probably the very first one. in “On Doplomacy in Bright Nike..” the author wrote about how he feels almost every morning during his run. I think i like this essay the best because i can relate to it the most, and i feel the same things he does when he wakes up to that annoying alarm clock. It is also a very unique essay because he describes the scenery so well where most people have not experienced something like that before in their lives. This essay, along with “Intorducing Clark Kent..” helped me realize that colleges reading these essays do not want to waste their time reading essays that drag on about nothing. They are looking for originality and personality throughout essays. After reading these it helped me better understand the concept that most of these High school students are trying to show in their writing… to be themselves.
October 6th, 2009 at 7:12 am
I think that the essay that stuck out the most was probably the very first one. in “On Doplomacy in Bright Nike..” the author wrote about how he feels almost every morning during his run. I think i like this essay the best because i can relate to it the most, and i feel the same things he does when he wakes up to that annoying alarm clock. It is also a very unique essay because he describes the scenery so well where most people have not experienced something like that before in their lives. This essay, along with “Intorducing Clark Kent..” helped me realize that colleges reading these essays do not want to waste their time reading essays that drag on about nothing. They are looking for originality and personality throughout essays. After reading these it helped me better understand the concept that most of these High school students are trying to show in their writing… to be themselves.
And just on my thoughts, i thought that the Majic trick was awesome! ha!
October 6th, 2009 at 7:15 am
After reading the point of view essays, the one that stood out to me the most was “A Grateful Glance into Trash”. The opening sentence was inticing, and it immediately caught my attention. For my own college application essay, I would like it to immediately attract the attention of the reader, so that they want to continue reading. I thought this essay had that effect. It was also well-developed with a strong use of language. Another essay that caught my attention was “Thoughts Behind a Steam-Coated Door” because of the imagery Mahajan used in the opening paragraphs. When she discusses the sound of the shower watter hitting the tiles, her uses of vivid imagery makes her essay more interesting to read. After reading her essay, I was inspired to include more details into my college application essay. Reading the point of view essays were especially interesting because they showed me how to write about a point of view without coming off in a bad way. I learned better ways of wording things so that I don’t sound like I am writing what I want the college administrater to hear.
October 6th, 2009 at 7:23 am
After reading the third set of Harvard essays, the one I liked the most was “The Magic of Magic.” It was simple point of view essay, but it was so interesting! It immediately caught my attention. The box in the beginning and the game he made us to that lead to the word it really shocked me. How did he know that? I even tried it twice after but it stil lead to the word it. I love how he really shows a passion for magic and its not just made up because he had good reference to a book by Paul Harris. I also really liked the essay “Thought Behind a Steam-Coated Door.” I loved the quote at the beginning, “Till taught by pain. Men really know not what good water’s worth.” By Lord Byron. I love how this essay was taking such a simple thing as a shower and making it into something special. I like how she put her thoughts into this point of view essay. I learn from these essays that we do not need to put so much details into our point of view essays. We can write about simple things that have had effects on out lives.
October 6th, 2009 at 11:22 am
This batch of essays was a lot more interesting than the last. The first one about the guy running in russia I especially liked. He told something about himself while still staying causal and really let his personality show in his writing. Like i said before i’ve finished all of my applications and have no more essays to write, but i feel confident in my essay that i’ve sent from these essays. I feel that my writing was creative and said something about myself and who i strive to be as a person.
October 6th, 2009 at 2:44 pm
These POV college essays were all interesting in their own way, but some of seemed to ramble on about discretely hidden “hey look what ive done!” Like “Introducing Clark Kent and Willy Wonka” I liked the essay at first, but then it went on for too long. If the author would have omitted the middle part or it, or made it more readable I would have enjoyed it more. The one that stood out to me the most was “On Diplomacy in Bright Nike Running Tights” because it was actually catchy while being informational. From reading these sample essays I know that I need to grab the reader’s attention without taking too long to get to it, or even just writing too long of an essay. I do not think I will write a POV essay just because knowing me, I would make it boring.
October 6th, 2009 at 2:55 pm
My favorite essay out of this group was probably “On Diplomacy in Bright Nike Running Tights”. I really liked this essay becuase within those few pages I really go to know Kirchhoff. I found out that he enjoyed running and that he was a think who dwelt on his feelings and emotions rather than the immediate action he would have to something. When he saw the sailor he thought about the irony that both probably at one point or another had studied eachother in school. Or how the words of his fellow classmate seemed so insignificant to what he had truly experienced while in Russia. Overall, with each essay I read I need to be more personable, I need to think of times in my life where I experienced something that brought out an aspect of me that has yet to be uncovered.
October 6th, 2009 at 3:17 pm
This group of essays were, like the others, extremely creative and personal. I specifically enjoyed the “The Magic of Magic” essay because it gets the reader involved. You actually stop and follow his directions to see the magic, it gets you interested in the rest of the paper. I also enjoyed the “Vietnamese Soup” essay. I liked how the writer tied in the food dish to her own personal identity and life. I also like that the essay is short and to the point, yet is full of detail and keeps your interest. Overall I think that these essays were the most creative overall, and it made them fun to read. They show the personality of the writer through subjects that you wouldn’t think to write about, they are quite interesting.
October 6th, 2009 at 5:23 pm
The Magic one stood out because the author put a magic trick in the essay. So that was pretty cool. The other one was about superman. Although he only mentioned superman, the title grabbed my attention. The steam coated door was to personal but i guess that made it stand out. I think what i’ve learned over all is to write about something that will stand out.
October 6th, 2009 at 5:24 pm
This group of essays were very strong, and among my favorites of all the essays we have read so far. I liked almost all of the essays, but the one that stood out to me the most was “The Magic of Magic.” The essay was extremely creative because it was interactive. The trick in the beginning got the reader involved an made the essay exciting to read. Also the topic was original, i mean who writes about magic? It has inspired me to not be afraid to pick an original topic, instead of one that has been seen over and over again by the college application essay reviewers.
October 6th, 2009 at 5:38 pm
These essays I didn’t find as memorable or interesting as the essays we have read in the past. But “The Magic of Magic” was very striking to me because of how unique and creative it was compared to all the other standard essays. I realized about half way through the packet that these essays were not as simplistic as the others and you have to pay good attention to detail while reading it. These essays have taught me that unlike the other essays, the topic can be about something you do everyday. It doesn’t have to be about a once in a life time experience
October 6th, 2009 at 6:14 pm
These essays appealed to me because they were in a similar reminiscence format that mine was in. The first essay about a foreign exchange student who went to russia made me think of the time i spent in europe, so i could relate to the writers reaction to the type of people who lived in russia. Since these essays were all in first person i was able to gain a better understanding of how the writer thinks, so i drew much more from the writers than i could any where else.
October 6th, 2009 at 6:57 pm
The essay that I liked the most was “On diplomacey in Bright Nike Running Tights” I really liked how the author used somthing so simple to direct one of his major opinions. By having the essay be directly about the author and about their experiences leading to a point of view they had made me interested. I like these essays just as much aa the frist sample essays we read, because i think that we as the audience can inquire much more about them and their personalities, then the 2nd essays. I think that after reading these I can use one of my point of views to show my personality.
October 6th, 2009 at 7:48 pm
Three essays that stood out the most to me were “On Diplomacy in Bright Nike Running Tights,”The End Is Where We Start From,” and “Thoughts Behind a Steam-Coated Door.” I think they stood out the most according to me because I can relate to each of them. I relate to the essay “On Diplomacy in Bright Nike Running Tights,” because I also run. But what I like about it is the diffence in what he learns durning his morning jogs. I also like how he used his Bright Nike Running Tights as a way to make the reader remember the essay. A lot of eople can relate to the essay, “The End Is Where We Start From.” I liked how the author used a quote in an effective way. The quote was enticing and I kind of wish it would be our senior quote. Anyways I liked how the author was able to portray that he liked to think of the future instead of lingering on the past. I would like to incorporate this into my essay because I do also. Everyone takes showers, or rather, hopefully everyone takes showers. In “Thoughts Behind a Steam-Coated Door,” I loved the imagery and the vocabulary she used to describe her showers. She took an ordinary event and made it unique and rememberable. I would like to do this in my essay also.
Another essay i really liked was “The Magic of Magic” because it got the reader involved. It would be very hard to forget an essay like this one.
October 6th, 2009 at 8:57 pm
While reading these essays, the essay “The Magic of Magic” first stood out to me by teh orginality of the essay and the magic trick at the beginning of the essay allowed it to catch my attention. This author did a good job in this essay, because it is different, which is a major quality i must incorporate in my Final Essay. Also, the essay “Thoughts Behind a Steam-Coated Door”, stood out to me because it was relatable to my own life. I too have imaginative thoughts in the shower, and i thought that this author did a fantastic job of demonstrating her imagination throughout her essay. Her essay was about an activity we all do everyday, yet her stylistic flair allowed her essay to stand out, a quality I plan to incorporate in my Final Essay.
October 6th, 2009 at 9:33 pm
“Thoughts Behind A Steam-Coated Door” really stood out to me because I felt like the imagery was of a scene that anyone could relate to, but the reader is intrigued by what the Mahajan will do to make this ordinary daily function interesting. I also really enjoyed “The Magic of Magic” because I never would think to include a game or trick in my essay out of fear that the diversion from actually writing my annoy the reader. Greenbaum did a great job with it though and I was interested right away. He also continues on to explain its relation to his topic very well. I have learned from these essays that something terribly unique or monumental does not need to happen to people in order for them to write an interesting college application essay. It is more about writing on something ordinary and how it is unique or monumental to that person. In my college application essay I would like to be able to write about the not so unique things in my life in a unique and interesting way that captures the reader’s attention.
October 6th, 2009 at 9:52 pm
The third set of Harvard essays are unique and intelligent, just like the last two batches. The essay that I really did not care for was “Introducing Clark Kent and Willy Wonka.” We understand that this student is brilliant and capable of verbal gymnastics, but his pretentious references and the length of the essay did not hold my attention. It can be assumed that those applying to one of the Ivies is going to be verbose and well read , this essay proves that assumption. There were a few point of view essays that I liked, “On Diplomacy in Bright Nike Running Tights,” because of the uncommon setting, I also liked “The Magic of Magic” due to the effective way the author made his essay stand out. From these essays I ultimately learned that my point of view matters when applying for schools. There are so many standard do’s and don’ts regarding college applications, it is nice to know that any unique ideas could help me get into the college of my choice.
October 6th, 2009 at 10:05 pm
What stood out to me most in this group of essays was the first essay, “On Diplomacy in Bright Nike Running Tights.” It was the most story-like essay of the group to me and it really took me to Russia to experience what the author was talking about. It had a great beginning which is what a good essay needs. From this I am taking that more sensory details are needed and specifics are always necessary. Also, my essay needs to be more focused on me and how the events have shaped me. Overall, though, this bunch of essays was greater than the previous, but I am not sure if they were quite as good as the first set of essays that we were given.
October 7th, 2009 at 7:23 am
Once again, I do not think these essays were as enjoyable as the first one. As I read “Introducing Clark Kent and Willy Wonka”, I was mostly just confused. He tried to use big words to make it seem more interesting, but in just made it harder to read. This has shown me to make my application essays more reader friendly instead of trying to make myself smart.
The essay that stood out to me the most was “Thoughts Behind a Steam-Coated Door”. It was the most entertaining, and it talked about how the shower was her safe place away from everyone. It shows how something so ordinary could mean so much to her.
October 7th, 2009 at 7:23 am
The essay that stood out to me was the essay “The magic of magic” this essay stood out the most because of the maic trick in the beginning of the essay…and it actually worked! it was as the author said astonishing. i couldnt believe that it actually worked and it made me want to read on to see if he was going to explain how he did it. he didnt explain how he did it though, but he did write about why he did it. The trick in the beginning really caught my attention and allowed me to understand the essay even more than i would have without the trick in the begining. this essay has helped me because i know that i need to add something in the begining of my college app essay that is going to grab the attention of the reader and hold it throughout the essay.
October 7th, 2009 at 7:25 am
I really enjoy reading these essays. Often I look at these packets as more work, but really it’s hard not to enjoy them. I noticed in some of the essays that They told a story, or explained a memory that pertained to what they were going to college for, for example the essay ” on diplomacy in bright Nike Running Tights” Was my favorite. From the beginning I wanted to know why he was up at 5.45. It made me ask questiond and get involved. That is a new way for me to write my essay. I have already rewriten my college application essay, but thee packets do make for a good read.
October 7th, 2009 at 7:12 pm
I liked reading this set of essays, but not as much as the second set. I thought that some of the essays in this set were a little harder to understand and they were not so clear. I did like “On Diplomacy in Bright Nike Running Tights” because the author had very unique experience and was really focused on doing something positive with his life. I also liked “The Magic of Magic” because it was so creative. I thought that the other ones were too wordy and took too long to get to the point. I did not like “Catharsis in Uncluttering” because the format was just way too unconventional; I had to read it a couple times before I understood what it meant. I thought that “History as Calculus” was really boring. From reading this set of essays I realized that I need to work on is indirectly telling about who I am in an essay by relating an experience.
October 7th, 2009 at 8:15 pm
The essay that caught my attention the most was the Magic of Magic. However, he tricked us into all being hung up on his essay(he is a magician afterall). But really, he did not write a brilliant essay, he simply engaged the reader by putting a magic trick at the beginning of it. The rest of the essay was nothing spectacular and a big cliche. I do not think just because he had a clever magic trick at the beginning of his essay that means he should get into Harvard. An essay I did like especially was “On Diplomacy and Bright Running Tights.” The writing illustrated that the boy was actually intelligent as well as a creative writer. He caught my interest, but with his writing skills, not trickery. One thing in common with all of these essays was how they did not directly come out and tell talk about themselves. The expresses who they were in a more subtle way. This is something I need to incorporate into my college application essays.
October 8th, 2009 at 12:02 pm
Like the last group of essays these were a mixed batch. There were plenty of essays I did like, diplomancy took a situation I am very familar with, running at 5:45 in the morning, and incorporated his viewpoint on an entire county just by retelling events in his run. ” The magic of magic” also stood out with one of the most creative openings I have seen, though the last two paragraphs retreated into cliches, it was still an engaging and creative essay. On the other hand the “calculus” essay just reminded me of my botched attempts of philosophizing, Clark Kent meets Willy Wonka, seemed too take an alive and vibrant topic and smother it.